AND GOD SAID - TAKE YOUR SON ON A PICNIC AND KNIFE HIM
And God said,
"Hey, you know you love me right? You've promised always to be faithful to me and to give me your undying obedience, yeah?
Well, I've got a little testie for you, just to check you out.
Don't worry, nothing too extreme.
Look, Friday you've got the day off. You've been working so hard, you're never home and the kids never see you.
So pack up a picnic and surprise your son - tell him you're going to spend the day together, walking in the hills.
Put those biscuits in that he likes and some ginger beer.
Now you will be carrying the food, so make sure your son carries the wood for the fire. Nothing like a fire to create atmosphere and trigger a sing-a-long
.
Hey, almost forgot.
Take your biggest knife with you too.
At the end of the day, after the piccynic I want you and your son to pile up all the wood for the fire, but don't light it yet.
Here's the twist.
I want you then to take your son by surprise, bind him up with rope so he can't escape and strap him to the fire. Then sink the knife into his chest and set him on fire.
It's a small ask to show you really love me, eh!"
Well yes O God, s'pose it is. No prob. I'll get it all sorted.......
( p.s. God mutters under his breath to himself - Ha! Got him! It's just a sick sort of a joke really. I'll wait til the knife is about to be plunged and then cry
SSSTTTOOOPPP!"
----
http://ubdavid.org/bibleexploration/light-old-testament/graphics/2-5_abraham-sacrifice-isaac.jpg
"Hey, you know you love me right? You've promised always to be faithful to me and to give me your undying obedience, yeah?
Well, I've got a little testie for you, just to check you out.
Don't worry, nothing too extreme.
Look, Friday you've got the day off. You've been working so hard, you're never home and the kids never see you.
So pack up a picnic and surprise your son - tell him you're going to spend the day together, walking in the hills.
Put those biscuits in that he likes and some ginger beer.
Now you will be carrying the food, so make sure your son carries the wood for the fire. Nothing like a fire to create atmosphere and trigger a sing-a-long
.
Hey, almost forgot.
Take your biggest knife with you too.
At the end of the day, after the piccynic I want you and your son to pile up all the wood for the fire, but don't light it yet.
Here's the twist.
I want you then to take your son by surprise, bind him up with rope so he can't escape and strap him to the fire. Then sink the knife into his chest and set him on fire.
It's a small ask to show you really love me, eh!"
Well yes O God, s'pose it is. No prob. I'll get it all sorted.......
( p.s. God mutters under his breath to himself - Ha! Got him! It's just a sick sort of a joke really. I'll wait til the knife is about to be plunged and then cry
SSSTTTOOOPPP!"
----
http://ubdavid.org/bibleexploration/light-old-testament/graphics/2-5_abraham-sacrifice-isaac.jpg
posted by Bishop Jonathan Blake | 4:53 PM
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